Dust to dust (and dust and dust and dust)

November 3, 2009

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They say Eskimos have 200 words for snow. Lately I’m feeling like there must be at least half as many occasions for dust. What would you add to this list?

DUST STORM: A dense, orbital-sander-propelled cloud that spreads from room to room, fogging the air, choking your lungs, and coating everything you own.

DUST DEVIL: What you call your significant other when he/she creates a dust storm and forgets to put a towel under the door to the attic—the place now-formerly known as the Clean Storage Area.

PIGPEN DUST: Dust that wafts off of the skin, hair, and clothes of dust-storm survivors.

DUST MOP: The matted muss that is your hair.

CHICKEN-LITTLE DUST: Ceiling-sanding dust. You really do feel like the sky is falling when dust mixes with the salty sweat of your brow and drips into your eyes.

DUST TO DUST: A dusty mess so unholy that it sends you into an existential crisis.

MOTHER DUSTER: The expletive you mutter to yourself beneath your mask as you clean up said unholy mess.

META DUSTING: When your cleaning rags, Swiffer pads, cleaning solutions, and vacuum cleaner are themselves so filthy that they, too, require a rigorous dusting.

DUSTIN’ OFFMAN: Your dazed, dust-covered alter ego whose brain is so fargone that all he can do is mutter, “No, no, definitely not. Definitely not clean.”

ABOMINABLE SNOW DUST: A dust pile so thick your shoes leave tracks in it.

DIASPORA DUST: Dust that clings to the soles of your shoes and migrates to every corner of the Earth, or at least the house.

SISYPHUS DUST: When emptying the shop-vac bag creates—you guessed it—a dusty mess (this one inspired by Kathy of The Sow’s Ear.)

DUST-COLORED GLASSES: When dust clings to your window and makes it seem as though your entire world is a powdery, post-apocalyptic mess.

DUST MIGHT: What enables you to rally and clean your house. For the five. Millionth. Time.

{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Anonymous November 2, 2009 at 11:34 am

MUST DUST: a re-curring nightmare

Nathan November 2, 2009 at 11:58 am

I believe you should add “Dust Angel”. When one has completed his or her sanding tasks and is so elated that he or she falls to the floor and gleefully flails about, leaving a dust angel on the floor.

I’ve documented this occurrence as it happened to me in my dining room. Enjoy.

katy November 2, 2009 at 12:04 pm

dust boogers: the crusty brown nose friends you acquire after a day spent among dusty things

Anonymous November 2, 2009 at 2:54 pm

Dust in the wind – what happens when you open a door or window creating a dust flurry.

Jeff Benson November 2, 2009 at 3:13 pm

What a piece of work is a man, how noble in reason, how
infinite in faculties, in form and moving how express and
admirable, in action how like an angel, in apprehension how like
a god! the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals—and yet,
to me, what is this quintessence of dust?

Amy November 2, 2009 at 9:49 pm

Damn, Katy stole mine!

Nicole November 3, 2009 at 1:24 pm

These are HILARIOUS.

I so get the dust complaints though miy adventures aren’t nearly as rugged as yours in that department. I think you need to add

DUST BUN-NY: That one, perfect handprint that lives on your a** after you’ve attempted to free it — unsuccessfully — from dust. Exceptionally visible when wearing jeans or other dark-colored pants.

Pest control Austin November 6, 2009 at 3:28 pm

that’s really a fantastic post ! ! added to my favourite blogs list..

Lucy November 23, 2009 at 2:13 pm

Hilarious post — and the photo is really beautiful, actually. Great colors and composition. I’ve had dust boogers as well so that gets my vote.


Lucy from The Old House Web

Corbin Dodge May 17, 2016 at 10:21 pm

Once the dust settles—sweep and sweep again.
(or just use compressed air to make it dust in the wind again)

Dust in the wind—the steady flow of dust blown out a window by a portable fan

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